The kids are back in school and you’ve taken a deep breath. You finally have a moment to sit in peace and quiet and reflect on the events of the summer, both the highs and lows. Are you feeling a bit ashamed of the way that you frequently responded to your children after days and days of having them constantly under your feet? Did you yell, respond with sarcasm, get mad at too many small things and lose track of the bigger picture? If so, with the kids back in school, now is the time to regain control of your angry behavior with an online anger management class just for parents.
Ongoing research shows that parents who are chronically angry in front of their children often end up with less empathetic kids. The fact is that some children hear the angry outbursts so often that they become somewhat immune to it or learn to ignore it. Or, they model it, which results in bullying behavior towards their peers, and angry battles back at you. It can create a high conflict situation at home that not only destroys the parent-child relationship, but also deteriorates the marriage.
Most anger as a parent comes from frustration. Your toddler is not meeting your expectations because he or she is throwing a tantrum, your 10 year old won’t clean up her room for your guests, your 12 year old is talking back disrespectfully to you in front of other adults, or the teenager isn’t studying enough and it’s resulting in poor grades. The bottom line as parents is that we have to realize that life is full of things we can’t control, including others. We can only do our best to influence proper manners, teach work and study ethics and model respectful behavior. However, we can’t control our children’s responses, only our own.
It’s extremely important that as parents we find appropriate and realistic ways to deal with our anger for the future good of the entire family. How many times did you blow up over the last couple of months over small things? Learning to pick your battles wisely while letting the smaller stuff go can cut down on the number of high conflict situations. Learning ways to give yourself a time out to calm down and think about your response instead of angrily reacting is a critical tool that most of us could use. And, utilizing new stress management coping mechanisms including breathing exercises, physical exercise, changing your self-talk and adjusting expectations can change your entire outlook on the event at hand.
With the onset of a fresh school year, taking an online anger management class designed to specifically address the challenges facing parents today is the easiest and most convenient way to learn new responses. If you accept the challenge to improve your parenting skills, remember that it will take time and effort to slowly implement change. With determination, you will find the household becoming more well balanced, relationships improving with your loved ones and life becoming less stressful.