It’s normal for couples to argue and the truth is that it’s actually part of a healthy relationship. When you live with anyone day in and day out, there are bound to be issues that arise that frustrate one or both of you. In fact, studies show that even compatible couples have about 10 areas of disagreement that they may never resolve. Individuals in a strong relationship learn to navigate around these incompatibilities and instead focus on the positive aspects of the relationship.

The top 10 causes for marital discord include:

• Money problems – arguing over bills, spending, etc.
• Children – how to discipline, who is responsible for childcare, education.
• Household Responsibilities – who should do what.
• Friends – who are good friends and who causes problems.
• Family – issues with parents, siblings, children or stepchildren.
• Lack of Quality Time – due to differing business or leisure schedules or different hobbies that pull one partner away from the other.
• Expectations – partners develop different life goals.
• Romance – sex and infidelity, issues of how often.
• Personality Flaws – your partners idiosyncrasies become irritating

Anger is a strong emotion that signals to us that something is wrong. It keeps us on our toes and helps us to express our needs and frustrations until the situation is averted or confronted. Managing our anger is an essential skill to create healthy relationships with loved ones, friends and in the workplace.

It’s important to know how to constructively resolve bumps in the road with your loved one, before they become mountains. It’s not always easy and if a couple doesn’t have the skills to deal effectively with their stress and anger, it can become a roadblock to living a happy life together.

So, the question is can you stay satisfied in your marriage in spite of the differences you face. The answer is yes as long as you are both committed to learn the anger management skills necessary to appropriately resolve conflict. It starts with effective communication techniques. Take a deep breath and treat your spouse with respect when you respond. Share your thoughts in a clear and non-aggressive way. Listen empathetically and attentively to their response. If they think you are willing listen to their point of view, it will lower the tension and allow for a more constructive discussion.

Another key component to a successful marriage is being flexible and able to adjust expectations. Unrealistic expectations of one another can cause resentment, bitterness and ultimately anger. Share your feelings with your spouse, and have realistic notions that you will argue at times, you will both make mistakes, and you will have differences. And, learn to forgive but not forget.

High quality online anger management classes help couples learn the communication and listening skills as well as stress and anger control techniques necessary to strengthen their relationship. Online classes can be taken individually or together from any Internet connected computer device. This enables you to stay in the comfort of your own home to learn the material. Classes can be entered and exited at any time so couples can stop the program to continue discussing a topic that arises. It’s an easy, affordable and convenient way to help couples stay together.

Anger is a natural occurring emotion that every one of us experiences. We might react to a person or situation that has displeased us with feelings of irritation, frustration and anger. Daily examples of this happen when we run into a traffic jam making us late to work, or have to reprimand a stubborn child who won’t follow directions, or deal with a computer that won’t work as fast as we’d like, or even talk with an uncooperative spouse. It’s how you respond to these situations that determines if it’s time for help. If your anger is out of control and filled with rage it can impact judgment and decision making skills, resulting in irrational behavior. These reactions can leave others around you feeling scared or hurt and can breakdown relationships, cause incidents of road rage and impede promotion at work and progress at school. Chronic anger can also contribute to a plethora of health problems that include insomnia, high blood pressure, headaches, back pain, digestive disorders and even heart attack and stroke. It also leads to mental issues like depression, low self-esteem, drug and/or alcohol abuse and eating disorders.

Anger management classes are designed to be done in-group settings or privately by taking a program online. The goal is gain the skills to recognize what is triggering your anger and learn ways to take action to deal with the person or occurrence in a rational, calm and positive way. Research shows that anger control is a skill that can be learned, even later in life.

Participants of anger management classes will learn how to identify the signs that they are about to blow up. Most people have some physical reaction to anger like a faster heartbeat, breathing more rapidly, tension in the jaw or clenching of fists. Then you will learn how to respond in effective ways utilizing stress management and relaxation techniques, better listening and communication skills, empathy, and taking a close look at the way you are thinking. Most people don’t realize that as we go through the day we are interpreting in our head what is said and happening around us. Instead of looking at things negatively like “I’m never going to be accepted by my peers” try “If I keep acting friendly, I will eventually make some good friends”. With practice, conquering negative habits will help to break the angry cycle.

There are different approaches to learning new anger management skills. An increasingly popular format is to take the course online in the privacy and comfort of your own home. Highly respected programs are available to enroll in and take from your Internet connected computer 24/7. This is perfect for busy people who can’t make a weekly instructor lead classroom meeting, or don’t like having to share their story with strangers.

Online classes can be taken purely for self-improvement purposes or are often utilized to fulfill court mandated anger management education requirements. Just check with your attorney, probation officer or judge to make sure that your legal system will accept a distance learning class. Whatever the reason, if you are ready to take the challenge, you will find this the quickest and easiest way to learn the material.

The kids are back in school and you’ve taken a deep breath. You finally have a moment to sit in peace and quiet and reflect on the events of the summer, both the highs and lows. Are you feeling a bit ashamed of the way that you frequently responded to your children after days and days of having them constantly under your feet? Did you yell, respond with sarcasm, get mad at too many small things and lose track of the bigger picture? If so, with the kids back in school, now is the time to regain control of your angry behavior with an online anger management class just for parents.

Ongoing research shows that parents who are chronically angry in front of their children often end up with less empathetic kids. The fact is that some children hear the angry outbursts so often that they become somewhat immune to it or learn to ignore it. Or, they model it, which results in bullying behavior towards their peers, and angry battles back at you. It can create a high conflict situation at home that not only destroys the parent-child relationship, but also deteriorates the marriage.

Most anger as a parent comes from frustration. Your toddler is not meeting your expectations because he or she is throwing a tantrum, your 10 year old won’t clean up her room for your guests, your 12 year old is talking back disrespectfully to you in front of other adults, or the teenager isn’t studying enough and it’s resulting in poor grades. The bottom line as parents is that we have to realize that life is full of things we can’t control, including others. We can only do our best to influence proper manners, teach work and study ethics and model respectful behavior. However, we can’t control our children’s responses, only our own.

It’s extremely important that as parents we find appropriate and realistic ways to deal with our anger for the future good of the entire family. How many times did you blow up over the last couple of months over small things? Learning to pick your battles wisely while letting the smaller stuff go can cut down on the number of high conflict situations. Learning ways to give yourself a time out to calm down and think about your response instead of angrily reacting is a critical tool that most of us could use. And, utilizing new stress management coping mechanisms including breathing exercises, physical exercise, changing your self-talk and adjusting expectations can change your entire outlook on the event at hand.

With the onset of a fresh school year, taking an online anger management class designed to specifically address the challenges facing parents today is the easiest and most convenient way to learn new responses. If you accept the challenge to improve your parenting skills, remember that it will take time and effort to slowly implement change. With determination, you will find the household becoming more well balanced, relationships improving with your loved ones and life becoming less stressful.

Conflict is a part of every normal relationship. Even in the best of circumstances, people don’t always agree on everything. Strong, healthy personal and professional relationships start with people who know how to respond to disagreement in a positive and respectful way. Good conflict resolution skills really depend on your level of self-awareness. Understanding what triggers your anger, how to manage your stress and calm yourself down before responding, empathetic listening and thoughtful communication in a respectful, non-threatening manner will enable you to resolve life’s conflicts in a successful way.

For many people these skills come naturally or were modeled in childhood by parents and loved ones. However, for some, uncontrolled anger takes over and the results contribute to a breakdown of close relationships, problems at work or school, bullying behavior or always feeling like you have to internalize your problems and are being taken advantage of. Over time, this behavior can also contribute to depression, isolation, and physical ailments like high blood pressure or stomach problems. Taking anger management classes is one way that individuals can work on improving skills necessary for a healthier emotional and physical lifestyle.

The key points in conflict resolution are listening and communicating. Simply acknowledging the other’s feelings can often help calm down the situation. Some tips for being a more effective listener include:

1. Be patient and give the other person the opportunity to explain why he or she is upset.

2. Repeat back what you are hearing to be clear that you understand their point.

3. Don’t interrupt with your point of view until the other person has completed his thoughts.

Both non-verbal and verbal aspects of communication contribute to the outcome of the conflict. Take the following tips into consideration:

1. Explain your beliefs in a way that is clear, but respectful.

2. Don’t put the other person on the defense or make them feel frightened.

3. Don’t just tell the other person what she is doing wrong, but phrase things using “I feel” statements.

4. Be aware of and manage your tone of voice, facial expressions and how you are standing. If you are in their personal space, back up. If you are yelling, tone it down.

Learning to manage your temper and control your responses will lead to stronger conflict resolution abilities. Online anger classes are a great way to change the way you have been reacting to stress. They are perfect for busy people who don’t have time to get to a weekly class or one-on-one counseling appointments. Classes are available in different lengths, beginning with a standard 8-hour class. They can be taken at your convenience at any time of the day or night, so you can learn on your schedule. Most importantly, classes can be accessed from any Internet connected computer device like a Smartphone, Tablet, PC or Laptop and from any of the 50 states. If you are a truck driver or executive who travels a lot, you can learn from different hotel rooms along the way.

Many clients tell us that learning new conflict resolution skills has helped divert divorce, increase their status and promotions at work and/or helped them to maintain long-term relationships. Investing in your own self-improvement today will lead to a more satisfying and rewarding life.

How we express our anger is often something we model from behavior we were exposed to in our childhood. Someone who grew up in a household in which one or both parents would yell and become aggressive when mad at someone or something, might display this same behavior in his or her own adulthood. Or, a person who was rewarded to stop a temper tantrum might continue this behavior thinking they will get a positive response. If you find yourself at a point in your life in which this impulsive behavior is causing problems with relationships with your loved ones, with friends, at work or school, it’s time to make a change. Just as we can learn how to express anger from others, we can also learn to change our reactions.

What Should I do?

First and foremost, if you find yourself in a situation in which you are losing control of your response, leave. Utilize calming techniques by walking away from the person or episode that is causing the anger. If you are in a big family event, take a walk around the block. If you are in a boardroom meeting, excuse yourself and go have a drink of water in a quiet spot to help decompress. This doesn’t mean you should take off for the day, but rather gather yourself and return when you feel like you can express your thoughts in a controlled, effective way.

Numerous studies show that internalizing your feelings isn’t the answer either. In fact, this behavior can lead to depression, substance abuse, eating too much or not enough, stress and gastrointestinal issues. It’s important to get your feelings out on the table in a polite but assertive way. Then listen to the other person’s perspective without interrupting and do your best to put yourself in their shoes. Sometimes what we hear someone saying is not exactly what he or she means. Paraphrasing what you just heard back to the person can clarify their point and help you to find a middle ground.

Redirect your anger to make a change in yourself and/or in the world. It takes practice and determination to overcome old bad habits. Learn to identify what triggers your anger and do something to help calm yourself down. This can include exercise, hobbies, or finding a cause to get behind that might help your community.

Most importantly, seek support. Taking an educationally based anger management course will teach you the techniques you need to lower your stress level, increase your empathy, speak more effectively and gain a new perspective on how to think about things. If you are too busy to add a weekly class into your crazy schedule, then try taking one online. The online format enables participants to learn from the comfort of their own home whenever they have free time. There is no timeline that you have to follow, so you determine how slowly or quickly you get through the information. An 8 or 12 class is all many of us need to get rebooted into a calmer, healthier and more well balanced lifestyle.  There is no question that it is time well spent!